Math jokes~ XD
THIS, is hilarious. Seriously. Haha... Have fun!
BALL BEARINGS
A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer were being interviewed. As part of the process, they were given 2 brass ball bearings, left alone for a while, then asked what they had done.
Mathematician: "I haven't done anything with them, but I've some theories about 2-ness."
Physicist: "I've tried to balance one on the other, and have some ideas about friction."
Engineer: "Er... they broke."
*******************************************
BLACK SHEEP
An engineer, a physicist, a statistician and a mathematician were on a train heading north, and had just crossed the border into Scotland.
The engineer looked out of the window and said "Look! Scottish sheep are black!"
The physicist said, "No, no. Some Scottish sheep are black."
The statistician : "It's not significant. We only know there's one black sheep"
The mathematician looked irritated. "There is at least one field, containing at least one sheep, of which at least one side is black."
**********************************************
BONE
Three hungry cannibals --- who were a chemist, a physicist and an engineer --- found a human thigh bone.
The chemist licked it, and put it in water to try to dissolve it.
The physicist tried to break it open to get at the marrow.
The engineer took it, hit the other two over the head, and ate them.
**********************************************
FENCE
An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are shown a pasture with a herd of sheep, and told to put them inside the smallest possible amount of fence.
The engineer is first. He herds the sheep into a circle and then puts the fence around them, declaring, "A circle will use the least fence for a given area, so this is the best solution."
The physicist is next. He creates a circular fence of infinite radius around the sheep, and then draws the fence tight around the herd, declaring, "This will give the smallest circular fence around the herd."
The mathematician is last. After giving the problem a little thought, he puts a small fence around himself and then declares, "I define myself to be on the outside."
********************************************
PUNCTURE
A project manager, a hardware engineer, and a programmer were in a car. Coming down a hill, a tyre got a puncture, the car went out of control, and a bad crash was only narrowly averted.
The project manager wanted everyone to help draw up a plan of how to fix the car and carry on.
The hardware engineer wanted to change the tyre and carry on.
The programmer wanted to go back to the top of the hill, drive down again, and see if the problem happened again.
*********************************************
REALITY
An engineer thinks that equations are an approximation to reality.
A physicist thinks reality is an approximation to equations.
A mathematician doesn't care.
BALL BEARINGS
A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer were being interviewed. As part of the process, they were given 2 brass ball bearings, left alone for a while, then asked what they had done.
Mathematician: "I haven't done anything with them, but I've some theories about 2-ness."
Physicist: "I've tried to balance one on the other, and have some ideas about friction."
Engineer: "Er... they broke."
*******************************************
BLACK SHEEP
An engineer, a physicist, a statistician and a mathematician were on a train heading north, and had just crossed the border into Scotland.
The engineer looked out of the window and said "Look! Scottish sheep are black!"
The physicist said, "No, no. Some Scottish sheep are black."
The statistician : "It's not significant. We only know there's one black sheep"
The mathematician looked irritated. "There is at least one field, containing at least one sheep, of which at least one side is black."
**********************************************
BONE
Three hungry cannibals --- who were a chemist, a physicist and an engineer --- found a human thigh bone.
The chemist licked it, and put it in water to try to dissolve it.
The physicist tried to break it open to get at the marrow.
The engineer took it, hit the other two over the head, and ate them.
**********************************************
FENCE
An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are shown a pasture with a herd of sheep, and told to put them inside the smallest possible amount of fence.
The engineer is first. He herds the sheep into a circle and then puts the fence around them, declaring, "A circle will use the least fence for a given area, so this is the best solution."
The physicist is next. He creates a circular fence of infinite radius around the sheep, and then draws the fence tight around the herd, declaring, "This will give the smallest circular fence around the herd."
The mathematician is last. After giving the problem a little thought, he puts a small fence around himself and then declares, "I define myself to be on the outside."
********************************************
PUNCTURE
A project manager, a hardware engineer, and a programmer were in a car. Coming down a hill, a tyre got a puncture, the car went out of control, and a bad crash was only narrowly averted.
The project manager wanted everyone to help draw up a plan of how to fix the car and carry on.
The hardware engineer wanted to change the tyre and carry on.
The programmer wanted to go back to the top of the hill, drive down again, and see if the problem happened again.
*********************************************
REALITY
An engineer thinks that equations are an approximation to reality.
A physicist thinks reality is an approximation to equations.
A mathematician doesn't care.
posted by cookie at 8:31 AM
1 Comments:
Hahaha.... really funny.
So you are going to uk next year? it'll be easier since ur sis is already there. Hmm... never really travel round uk.. just london. Should be lotsa fun to study there.
Good luck to ur sis in settling down. Oh ya, mousetrap... i'm going to watch the exact same play only in chinese next month in melb uni.
Erin
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